Quixotic: Chivalry is dead ladies

I love this word.  First a little history lesson, this word was coined after the story of Don Quixote was published.  The story tells of a hero, Don Quixote, dreams up a romantic ideal world which he believes to be real. For example he winds up getting into imaginary fights with windmills that he regards as giants.

There are two main definitions for this word

1)extravagantly chivalrous or romantic

OR....

2) Exceedingly idealistic; unrealistic and impractical. 

I could not help but chuckle when I saw the parallel here.  After the chuckle came the fear. One little word telling me that all my fantasies about romance are "exceedingly idealistic.  One little word pointing, laughing, mocking my girlish notions of my white knight coming to rescue me.

One little word that says, "Hey just because your boyfriend smacks you on the ass, doesn't make him Christian Grey." 

What will women do if this word enters popular circulation?  Would it be the end of the chick flick? One more unrealistic than the next. Come to think of it, it is more our perception of the chick flick than the chick flick itself that is quixotic.  No matter what they create, we buy it, we want it, and we believe we can attain i.t

I guess when they coined the term "hopeless romantic" rather than meaning a person who is in love with love, it means that romance is hopeless.

All the of the doom and gloom being said, I think the word itself sounds romantic and whimsical.  Just saying quixotic gives me little flutter in my cockles of my heart and makes me want to go watch the Notebook and wash it down with a Sex in the City Marathon.  Maybe we will live happily ever after, after all.

Stunning

I was thinking about wanting to be swept off my feet.  What compliments would cause me to melt in a man’s hand.  Then I thought of the word for today –STUNNING. When I typically think of the word stunning, I think of the most informal of its definitions.          1) Striking beautiful; attractive; enticing. However, the second thing that came to my mind was a cattle prod or a stun gun.  This intrigued me enough to try and make the connection, which surprisingly wasn’t too difficult when you read the definitions below. 2) Commanding attention 3) Causing great astonishment and consternation; 4) or a. causing or capable of causing bewilderment or shock or insensibility; b. causing loss of physical or intellectual bearings; c. causing, capable of causing, or liable to cause astonishment, bewilderment, or a loss of consciousness or strength So obviously one can be rendered unconscious or lose strength with either a zap of the stun gun or by be taken with a great beauty.   This made me think, which came first the chicken or the bombshell? The best I could do was to find the following: 1250–1300; Middle English stonen, stunen (v.) < Old French estoner to shake, make resound; So I still can’t figure out whether the action or the adjective came first.  I like to think it was used to for good and then someone was so taken with a woman that they developed a stun gun to render her stunning in two senses of the word~

Evasive: The real slim shady

Evasive:

Tending to avoid commitment or self-revelation, esp. by responding only indirectly. Directed toward avoidance or escape; tending to evade grasp or pursuit    Hard to comprehend or define; clear perception or complete mental grasp; hard to express or define Preferring or living in solitude and anonymity   Difficult to remember

My favorite synonym: SHADY

This week’s word EVASIVE I chose for two reasons:

1) There are some similar words that I thought it would be cool to delve into then and find out what would be the proper usage for each.

2) I think that most people nowadays are evasive.  And I am so tired of needing a cryptogram to have a conversation.

Evasive versus Elusive, Illusory, Allusive: These are all different flavors having very similar meaning with subtle variations in usage. 

The word Evasive is used when what is being avoided is direct or relevant response to a verbal challenge and Elusive used when what is being avoided is physical capture or apprehension

Illusory AKA illusive means based on or having the nature of an illusion while Elusive means difficult to describe or skillful at eluding capture

Allusive is used as a way to say, “in reference to” the act of alluding or an indirect reference; casual mention

There are several slight variations on this word and each holds a particular significance for me right now.

When you meet someone or have a relationship with someone whether it is a friend, an acquaintance, a co-worker, or a lover, you meet them in a particular context.  Most of the time people are a certain versions of themselves depending on who they are near.  Not really their true 100% self.  Of course depending on the person, some people are more open than others.  But for the most part, people are hiders, or are elusive.  

Why are people elusive? Is it fear or cowardice perhaps laziness? Most likely it’s ALL of the above or some combination.

People may be afraid of rejection.  They may be afraid to look stupid or be wrong.  Maybe they just aren’t strong enough to put themselves out there.  Self discovery is HARD but sharing that revelation of self discovery with other people is takes monster strength. Hence along with elusiveness comes fear or avoidance of bearing your mind and soul to other people. Borderline cowardice.

The last two definitions I think go hand in hand.  Along with those folks that deiced to go ahead and have a safer elusive existence, who prefer to live in anonymity and solitude have to deal with one really sever consequence which is the last definition here: They wind up alone and forgotten.

Adore and Adoration. Sayer of things versus Doer of things

It has been a while since my last blog post and I have missed it.  I love words and their origins, their history, and how they have been sculpted over time.  Today's word is not a difficult or obscure word.  Just means something to me and spoke to me.  This is only my interpretation of it as well and I know is not 100% literally accurate. 

I love the words adore and adoration. Someone once said to me, "I adore you." However, what does that really mean.  

There are several definitions for this word.

1. to regard with the utmost esteem, love, and respect; honor.

2. to pay divine honor to; worship:

3. to like or admire very much:

So the first two definitions are very intense and are full of meaning and intent. The third definition is luke warm and almost ambivalent at best.  So when someone says, "I adore you!", how are you supposed to interpret that. I say that you have to look at the actions.  Adore itself is a verb which in its very nature imply action.  So to say the WORD adore means that there should be some action behind it. 

Adoration on the other hand is a noun, a thing. 

1. the act of paying honor, as to a divine being; worship.

2. reverent homage.

3.fervent and devoted love.

I have felt adoration before.  When a person hears you.  Really hears you and incorporates that almost seamlessly into their life and yours.  Just seeing you happy and wanting so badly to see your smile (which to them lights up the entire room) is enough to motivate them to do anything to replicate that happiness that smile over and over and over again.  You aren't ever inconvenient or a burden.  But a treasure, a gift.  That is adoration.

Although I have heard the words, I adore you, the act of feeling adoration from someone feels much more like an action verb than the word of action itself.  So being a DOER of adoration is far more meaningful that being a sayer of supposed adoring action.